BP hit 118/104 last night. After being super low all day. Not sure what happened, because I'm at 116/75 right now.

idk anymore

I really wanna see the neurologist noooow not next week. But. At least I haven't had another fainting spell since the last one. Almost thinking it could have been the diuretic? I get dehydrated super easy. I was drinking a lot of water, both times, but. I was also on the diuretic both times. And it didn't really bring my BP down much. The beta-blocker I'm on IS bringing it down. I just have random jumps.

I also wanna go home. So. Bad.

My blood pressure is 98/79 right now. Pulse is 93.




Shaking is getting worse too. I hate my hands right now

Bored. Trying not to go stir crazy.

Woke up with a headache on the top of my head. Parents made me sleep in their bed last night because my body was doing some funky shit. I feel better today, but they were worried I was gonna have another 'episode' or something, so I was forced to remain downstairs.

Yet they leave me home alone today. Which makes me antsy. Okay, technically my brother is here but he worked until 2 am last night, he's fast asleep. I'm 95% sure I'll be okay but. It's scary, having these fainting episodes and not knowing what sets them off exactly. I'm almost wondering if it WAS that BP medication, cause both times it happened, I was on it (I'm on different stuff now)

ANYWAY, like I said. I'm bored. I have the intense urge to be artistic but I can't. Multiple reasons why. I wanna sculpt and draw and God help me I wanna paint. frgnjbkrgesd why does this only happen when I CAN'T

So. I'm making a list cause I can. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE POKEMON Tus is curious.

( I tell ya'll my favs too but under a cut so I don't eat your f-list )

Can you tell I'm bored yet

Apparently I spoke too soon. I just woke up and my BP is 132/107, pulse is 90.

My frustration knows no bounds.

I felt so weird all last night, but my pulse dropped to 60, so I figured it must be that. Then this morning my BP decides to leap up, well THANKS BODY. STOP NOW. I WANNA GET OFF THE RIDE.

In other news, Season 3 finale of GLEE is tonight, but I may not see it till tomorrow, idk. Since I'm still at my parents there not a spot in the house for me to watch it live. No TV in my room anymore, since it's at MY HOUSE

Speaking of my house, I got to visit it on Sunday. My roommate, for my birthday, DECORATED MY ROOM <33333 And I adore it. She always went on and on about my walls being blank and bare, and I was just. Well my mom didn't let me put anything on the wall growing up so I'm used to it. Well, roommie took a trip to hobby lobby and omg it looks so nice




I looooves it <3 made me extra not wanna leave gah

Blood pressure has been stable since last night. This morning it was 112/85 and pulse of 82. Looks like the beta-blocker is working (unlike the diuretic) I'm still having hand tremors and don't feel quite right. I get distracted easier than ever, and I'm staring off into space a lot apparently. I also keep forgetting things. It's frustrating. Anything to do with numbers it seems like (I'll write down my BP then forget what it was a few minutes later, like, I know the range but not the exact numbers) and yesterday I could not for my life remember what the garage code was even though I've used it many times, like. When I lived here.

And I don't feel like myself. I keep feeling like somethings wrong. It's weird, I don't know how to describe it.

But happy about the BP. Hopefully it stays down this time. Because yesterday morning it was 140/100, then later in the day I got 115/80something

Now I'm just really tired. Fell asleep last night around 7:30 and I slept until 10 this morning. And I wanna take a nap now.

Better if I was healthy, but grateful for what I got this year

Parents bought me a fancy pillow, memory foam. It’s a joke in the family to get pillows as gifts, and I loooove pillows. More pillows the better.

They also bought me a new phone! I finally am getting a smart phone, I’ve been using my old ass phone forever (and it was my brothers before that lol) they got me an iphone 4 c: I get it sometime this week, in the mail. As well as a Texas Rangers JERSEY which is also being mailed here, so waiting on that too

Then they got me a sushi dinner, and red velvet cake. Yumyumyumyum

I’m 24~ Almost half way to 50. Half way to 48?

then today my roommate is coming to rescue me. I get to see my house, my cats, and my BABBY BOWSER (I have a bearded dragon, by the way) for the FIRST TIME IN THREE WEEKS. We're gonna go have lunch then just lounge at home all day (I don't think I'm up for more. I can't walk for very long before I'm out of breath)

But looking forward to that <3

Saw the doctor today. I'm being referred to neurology. She thinks when I "pass out" I'm having a seizure. Because I don't know where I am when I wake up then I start vomiting. And a few other things.

The CT I had on my head a couple weeks ago was normal but. She also wants me to see a cardiologist to just get a second opinion, make sure my heart is okay. Because my BP is not responding like it should to medication. She's putting me on something else (A beta-blocker instead of the diuretic), at the lowest dose she can.

Problem is, the neurologist won't see me until the 31st. I'm scared out of my mind, and I have to just sit and wait. They said they'd call me if something sooner opened, but this neurologist was the SOONEST I could get (Called 4 others too)

I just want someone to tell me what's wrong with me. And fix it.

Happy birthday to me? :\

I passed out again.

While sitting in the chair at the kitchen table. I wasn't doing ANYTHING then all of a sudden, pressure and heat in my face and I yelled for my brother. He told me that he came downstairs and I told him I felt like I was going to pass out, but I don't remember that.

Just like last time, I had a dream while I was out. So vivid I thought I was in another place, so I was super confused when I woke up with my brother leaning over me. Yet I don't remember the dream. Just like last time. I just know it was really soothing and peaceful, but then I wake up and I'm hyperventilating, and my hands are numb and my body is vibrating

Then I throw up like 43523465324 times

Unfortunately it isn't just like last time in on regard. My blood pressure just now was 131/106. Last time this happened, my BP dropped like an anvil and stayed down. Which is why I was discharged from the hospital, I suddenly appeared fine. Not so much this time :\

Guess I see my doctor tomorrow instead of Friday

edit - It's adorably sad how worried my parents dog is about me

Getting very weird readings for my BP. 114/95 earlier, heart rate was 103. Now it's 109/95 and heart rate of 76.

WHY. I feel very weird.

eferjkblefd

I really wanna do some art but of course I can't because my hands shake too much. That and my head hurts

lol I'm not on LJ in forever then I come back and just whine at ya'll, sorry. LJ is a good outlet.

Putting me back onto the blood pressure medication (It was 140/105 at her office). I had another spell last night, I didn’t pass out, but I did hyperventilate.

Also guess what. I HAVE A UTI. SHOCKER. I told her that every time I go to the doctor, I have a UTI, then every time, they tell me cultures came back negative. So she’s gonna look into that a bit deeper.

Before she said a UTI, she said if this isn’t being caused by all the medication, she thinks its my kidney. So. Gonna look into that too.

She said I’m showing signs of WITHDRAWAL from the fucking cymbalta. Which is rare for someone who was only on it FOUR DAYS but she did say it’s possible if my body is super extra sensitive.

which is why they’re concerned about putting me on any medication at all. It’s like. Well, what’s your body going to do if we give you this?

:C CAN I GET WELL NOW? PLEASE?